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Friday, April 27, 2012

Put down the Double Bacon Cheesburger w/ extra sauce

If you are ever feeling glum about your weight or self worth, I challenge you to get into your car and drive to your local "all you can eat" buffet. These local eateries can offer you anything from a slice of frozen pizza to (how ever the hell you pronounce it) general Tso's chicken, but what they can also provide is a look into the future. People of all ages are dissipating food at alarming rates, only to slowly stand and waddle back to the buffet line for plate number five. Take a glance, how many people can you see are not overweight? How many children? A recent CDC survey shows 35.7% of U.S adults are obese, U.S children ages 2-19, 17%. We can all argue the accuracy of these statistics and what the true definition of "obese" is, but what we cannot argue is the dilemma the world is facing. Yes I said "the world", because although it is widely believed that this large problem is only present in America, that is not the case. Recently Mexico has taken the cake, and is now the fattest country in the world, with the U.S a close second. The rest of them are not far behind, with most countries falling in the mid 20's in percentile (excluding Japan and Korea, whom are both under 5%). What does this mean for the future? New technologies and consumer products that do everything but brush your teeth, combined with a pure lack of self control, we see the human race eating itself to death. The food consumption is just as big of an issue as the absence of exercise. I personally hate to work out, but do find it necessary to maintain a healthy lifestyle. As little as one hour of "activity" over the course of a day can do wonders. These activities can range from a brisk walk, to playing with your kids, it's not hard to accomplish. What amazes me is the amount of staggering statistics that link obesity to things such as diabetes, heart attacks, and many other health issues, and how people still don't care. It is not just about looks, it is also about life, and quality of life. If a doctor informed me that my life expectancy was shortened due to being overweight, you bet your boots I would be in the gym and out of the fast food restaurants. People don't hold the same importance of life as they used to. You can not live life to the fullest if you are packing an extra 80 pounds, and even if you could, you wouldn't live as long as you should have. When I think of all these things, I can't help but remember the Disney Pixar film "WALL-E", and how it ingeniously displayed the future. Humans so huge they couldn't even stand, due to the amount of fancy gadgets they had created. Dull and common, the destined version of our current selves spent day after day, lackadaisically eating and watching television. The fate of our race in this movie was not that far out of the realm of possibility, or that far away in terms of years. A selfish part of me doesn't care, because I am not overweight. My kids are not overweight. My wife is not overweight. The caring side of me is concerned with others not being able to enjoy life, because it is so breath taking. The biggest concern I have is the children. Children are so innocent and pure, and have limited knowledge of how to eat right, and exercise. The privileged individuals that are teaching them these things are the parents. So when I see a portly child, it kills me, because they can't run and play adequately, are unable to fit their clothes, or perform the basic functions that make being a kid so great, and they have absolutely no control over it whatsoever. Kids eat what they are fed, if dad lays a happy meal on the table, you eat it. The present day standard of parenting hasn't just lowered the bar, they knocked the damn thing off its stand, melted it down, and made a XXL sized spoon out of it, to scoop more food into their fat faces. It's not just about nutrition and exercise. Morals, respect, competitiveness, self esteem ect., these have all been lost as well. I am not here to preach to everyone and say that I am the healthiest and most fit person in the world, and that I don't eat pizza and be lazy. What I can say, is that just making a small effort, can help you save your life. Make some changes before it's too late, and you wake up, look in the mirror, and find yourself 400 lbs with diabetes and high risk of heart failure. It is not easy, especially when the healthier alternative for foods are twice as expensive, and decent gym memberships cost an arm and a leg, but it is necessary. The paranoid version of myself thinks that the government wants us to stay fat, although I cannot string together a intelligent conspiracy theory in which they would benefit having no one able to touch their toes. The government doesn't concern me though, it's places like McDonalds, Carls Jr, Wendy's, blah blah blah you know all the places, they are making millions killing people, not unlike tobacco companies. We sit idle and complacent, opting to order another Big Mac, or Big Carl instead of making changes. It is because we as people have grown increasingly lazy. Why ride a bike when you have a car? Why go inside when you can go through the drive through? No need to go get your terrible food, get it delivered. Simple choices over the course of the day can affect your lifestyle for the better, but in most cases, the wrong choices are made, and repetition cements these poor habits into a daily routine. Break the cycle and be happy. If I were to do a survey of overweight or obese individuals asking whether or not they were happy with their lives, I would bet some serious money the answer would be no in 99% of the cases. I don't know quite what I am wanting to say, and don't want to seem like I am writing this whole blog to crush what little self esteem these people have left, but it frustrates me. I have many friends and multiple family members that struggle with their weight, and I have sympathy for them. These same people though, make little or no effort to change. These and others also complain that their backs hurt, knees hurt, hips hurt, whatever. So when I hear these complaints I tell them in as kind of words as I can find, "If you lost 40 pounds your _______ wouldn't hurt". I am sick of being sensitive to fat people who have put themselves in the very situation they so adamantly despise. (Let me clarify, most of these statements are about people who are morbidly obese, not your average everyday John Doe carrying an extra 15-20 pounds) Don't you worry though, because our massively obese population are often recieving state and federal assistance for the heath issues that are a direct result of their weight. If you think I am being rude I apologize, but hey, it's the way I feel. I also feel that all you can eat buffets should have a weight limit for their customers. Fast food restaurants should have a weight limit for their customers. Nah, the solutions that we as a people have come up with involve lipo suction and stomach stapling ect. Whatever, fat people don't read anyway so they won't get this.......joking guys, strictly joking. Final conclusion: Lose some weight, please. Be a parent, take control. Work out every now and then, it won't kill you. And just remember what a small little group of orange men once proclaimed in song:

"Oompa Loompa, do-ba-dee-doo,
I’ve got a perfect puzzle for you.
Oompa Loompa, do-ba-dee-dee,
If you are wise you’ll listen to me.
What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats.
What are you at getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
I don't like the look of it
Oompa Loompa do-ba-dee-da,
Given good manners you will go far.
You will live in happiness too,
Like the oompa loompa do-ba-dee-doo.
Do-ba-dee-doo"

Wiser words have rarely been sang. 

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